Childhood Weddings
by The Manga Witch
Summary: For the NatsumeSeries Contest. No OOCness I'm aware of. The gang decides to do play Weddings. This won't turn out to be good. Note: I have no idea what crackfic and AU means, so I don't really know if I followed the rules. I had author's block. Enjoy!


Ello people! This is my first one-shot so I hope u likey! Peace out home dog!

Natsume: Did you just quote Fred?

Me: Did you just recognize Fred's quote?

Hotaru: Touché...

Me: Ohoho (french laugh). Touché indeed. AAARGH!! Fire! Fire! My pants!!!! Damn you stupid rabbit!!!

(A.N.: For those of you who didn't read my first fanfic (Mari Hanayuki in Gakuen Alice) rabbit/bunny-chan is what Mari (main character/me) calls him, because according to her, his eyes resemble a white rabbit's (because they're red))

Natsume: Crazy hobo...

Me: Did you just call me a hobo?

Natsume: Hn...

Me: Your insults make no sense you freakin' perverted rabbit.

Aoi: Okaaaay. While niichan and Mari are fighting, let's hear the disclaimer.

Me: Disclaimer: Don't own any- Curse you rabbit! Be still so I can punch you harder! As I was saying I don't own anything and never will. Peace out home dog.

Natsume: Stop your freakin' Fred quoting, hobo!

Me: Bite me. Owww! You bit me!

Natsume: You asked for it, damn hobo.

Me: It's an _expression_ you stupid rabbit!

Aoi: Anywaaay. I hope you like the story. It has comments from me, Mari-sempai and Natsume-nii!

* * *

"Oi! Minna! Let's play weddings!!" Argh. It was the annoying seaweed head girl again. She was so stupid. The raven haired boy looked at her, a mixture of disgust and repulse etched across his face.

* * *

N: Wait. Aren't disgust and repulse the same thing you stupid hobo?

M: Shut the fuck up. The story hasn't even started yet.

A: Mari-sempai, such bad language...

N: You didn't hear anything, Aoi.

* * *

"That souds fun!" Mikan, Nonoko and Anna cried in unison. They were eleven-year-old girls, why wouldn't they have fun playing weddings?

* * *

N: Isn't this story supposed to be about me? As an _adult_ wedding planner?

M: Do you want me to use the f word in front of your sister again, rabbit?

N: I'll burn you.

M:Bite me. Oww! It's a freakin' _expression_, stupid rabbit.

* * *

"Okay then that's settled! Now we only need a bride and a groom." The raven boy perked up his ears. What if Mikan was chosen as bride?

* * *

N: I do _not_ like polka-dots.

A: Nii-chan, you're blushing.

M: Are you _really_ going to ramble about something every two lines?

N: What if I do.

M: I have a very special baka-cannon reserved just for you.

N: Bite me.

M: Eww. No.

N: It was a freakin' _expression_. Stupid hobo...

* * *

"Mikan." She lifted her head as she heard her name being called by Permy/Sumire. "You're a bridesmaid." Natsume looked down and sighed both disappointed and relieved. Disappointed, because if Mikan was the bride he'd surely find a way to be the groom. Relieved, because now nothing kept him from denying the offer of spending the afternoon with squealy girls and they're stupid yappering about dresses and all that whatnot. "I'm the bride!" Permy practically screamed this part.

"Will you be playing too, Ruka-pyon?" Mikan was staring at him with her puppy dog eyes.

"Ah... I- I- sure." He nodded and gave in to the puppy eyes. Hmph, weak. Natsume thought.

"What about you, Natsume?" The raven boy didn't notice she had crept close to him and now they were face to face. The irresistible puppy eyes looking at his crimson red ones.

* * *

N: Red and crimson are the same thing, hobooooo.

M: Fuck you, rabbit. *BAKAN*

A: Mari-sempai, you knocked him out...

M: I did, didn't I? -insert malefic (and proud?) grin here-

* * *

"Hn..."

"That's not an answer Nat-su-mee!" The puppy eyes were glaring at him. Cuteness overflowed as he, horrifiedly, heard himself say.

"Whatever..."

"Yay! What about you, Hotaru?"

"Will the food be real?"

"Umm... sure. Right, Permy?"

"My name's not Permy, but if it'll make Imai-san join us... why not? Anyway. You'll be a bridesmaid too Imai-san. Nonoko and Anna will be bridesmaids too. Mochu, Yuu and Kitsuneme are guests and Koko, you'll be the best man."

'So bossy', was what was running in everyone's mind.

"What am I?" Ruka asked worried about what he'd hear.

"The groom." His worst suspicions were confirmed.

"And what about Natsume?" Mikan asked.

"Umm... I don't really know... We already have enough guests..."

"What about the wedding planner? I guess he's important for the wedding." Seven startled faces (Hotaru was eating and Natsume was reading his oh-so-precious manga) turned around to see the beaming Narumi grinning at them.

* * *

A: Ahhhh! So this is what you planned all along.

M: Of course, I'm not stupid. Now let's punch him silly while he's still unconcious.

A: *sweatdops* I'll pass...

M: Suit yourself. *starts hitting Natsume with a baseball bat*

* * *

"Narumi-sensei... Ho long have you been standing behind us listening to our conversation?" A confused Mikan said.

"Since the jellyfish conversation. You're way too young to be thinking about that, let me just say to you."

**(A.N.: Okay, Natsume is still unconscious on the floor and Aoi went to get waffles so I'm alone here and about the conversation they were having before the wedding idea. I'll just leave that to your imagination.)**

"Okaaay... But Natsume as a wedding planner? Don't you think that's a liiiittle too far fetched." Mikan said.

"Not at all."

"Do I get to boss people around?" Natsume looked at Narumi.

"Umm... I think?"

"As long as I'm not stuck with the groom part." He eyed at Ruka who responded with a pleading look to get him out of there. "Okay, let's get this over with. There'll be flowers bla, bla, bla and a dress and some wierd after party mini sandwiches. And they all lived happily ever after in gay fairy land. The end."

BAKAN! BAKAN! BAKAN! BAKAN! BAKAN! BAKAN!

"If you're gonna do it, do it properly, Hyuuga. After party sandwiches are too little for me."

"It looks like _you're_ the one who's getting married. And why six bakan shots?" Sumire shot back.

"Hey! She's just giving her opinion! And Natsume won't faint with just the usual three..." Mikan ran to defend her best friend.

"Well I never asked her opinion. Neither did I ask yours. Why do you want Natsume-sama to faint? All he did was make the sandwiches too small..."

"Well I'm _giving_ my opinion, Permy. Don't mess with Hotaru about food or money."

"This is getting ugly, let's scram before they catch us." Koko said to Mochu and Kitsuneme. They ran for their lives and just when Yuu, Natsume and Ruka were about to follow their brave classmates' example all three of them felt a hand pull them back. Mikan held Natsume, Anna held Yuu and Permy/Sumire held Ruka. Hotaru and Nonoko were after the fugitives.

"I'll burn you." The crimson eyed boy threteaned.

"I'll Nullify it, so start planning, idiot."

"Fine. The flowers will be freakin' pink and white roses and the bridesmaids will have matching pink chiffon dresses **(A.N.: LOL, I'm such a loser, I don't even know what chiffon is, but it sounds nice and pretty)** and white ballerina flats. The bride's dress is simple yet has an elegant design and a nice cut with pairing medium heels. The groom and best man will be wearing a simple black tux with a white rose on the lappel for the groom and a pink one for the best man. The cake will have three layers and will be preferably chocolate with white frosting and decorative flowers. The after party will have small bite size salmon sanwiches and sushi, with peanut sauce... Any objections?"

* * *

M: I always knew you were gay deep inside, bunny-chan.

N: Shut up, freakin' hobo. You wrote this.

M: Oh, you're awake. Of course I wrote it. I'm the author and what I say goes.

N: And you decided to make me look gay...?

M: Yep!

A: I'm surrounded by pathetic people...

M+N: That's my line!

* * *

"Yes, one. Why the heck do you call Narumi-sensei gay when you're gayer?" Hotaru had come back.

"Shut up! There were a lot of girl magazines in my house..."

"And you read them because...?"

"Do you have the slightest idea what we have to entertain ourselves with on rainy day?"

"I don't think I want to know."

"Anyway, Iinchou, can you create an illusion for us?" Permy/Sumire asked a startled Yuu.

"Umm... first I need to know what some things are."

"Like what?" The raven haired boy asked.

"Umm... chiffon, ballerina flats, design, heels, tux, decorative flowers and salmon."

_30 minutes of explaining later_

"Sugoi! Iinchou it looks beautiful!" An awestruck brunette cried as she saw how the classroom had turned into a church. The decorations looked stunning.

"Let's go Ruka-sama!" A shrieking Permy/Sumire cried.

"Do I have to? Why can't I just switch places with Koko over there? I'll make a fine best man."

"Traitor." Koko muttered under his breath.

"Is that what you'd want in your wedding, Natsume?" The brunette asked.

"Not really... Permy squeals too much."

"I meant the decorations."

"Oh, no they're way too pink and boring. Do you know what would be nice theme color?"

"Yeah?"

"Red. With crimson lotuses as flowers."

"You're so full of yourself, Natsume." The brunette hit him lightly in the shoulder.

"And sakura blossoms..." He said this very quietly so the brunette couln't hear him. "But anyways, I don't even want a stupid wedding."

"Oh, too bad. I'd want one. I know! I'll invite you to mine!"

"Psh. Who cares." The hurt in his voice concealed, the fact that he'd recieve an invitation clearly stated he wouldn't be the groom.

* * *

N: I do _not_ have hurt in my voice just because she said that.

M: Shut up, rabbit we're getting to the good part.

N: What if I don't?

M: *BAKAN*

A: You knocked him out... again.

M: This is so fun!

* * *

"Hotaru-chan, come here she's going to throw the bouquet." Squealed a screaming Anna.

"I'm _eating_." Retorted an annoyed Hotaru.

"Aren't you going to try and catch it, polka-dots?" The raven boy asked.

"Nah, the flowers are an illusion. And I'm too young to get married."

"Whatever."

As the seaweed girl threw the bouquet up high it flew up in the air and landed on the least expected person.

"Natsume-kun?" Nonoko asked as Koko, Mochu and Ruka restrained a laugh.

"You caught it!"

"I didn't catch it. It fell on me, ugly."

"Mou, you're so mean, Natsume. But doesn't that mean you'll marry after Permy and Ruka?"

"I don't give a damn to freakin' girly superstitions."

_15 years later_

"You may now kiss the bride."

"Kyaaa! Weddings are so romantic don't you think, Koko?"

"Sumire, we got married two years ago."

"Hayate, hurry up or we'll miss cake."

"Coming, Hotaru."

"Don't nii-chan and nee-chan look so good together, Ruu-chan?"

"Umm... I think. It's more of a girl stuff to say that."

"They look sooo good together, Aoi-chan! Reminds me of your wedding with Ruka-kun."

"Aww. I'm sure you'll have a happy life with Yuu. And Nonoko and Kitsuneme-kun too."

"Anna, the cake is moving..."

"Really? Yuu-chan, I'm so sorry. I used the wrong ingredients."

_Up in the aisle:_

"Does that mean our wedding cake is busted?"

"Hn... I never liked chocolate anyway."

"Natsume... the cake is vanilla."

"Whatever."

"Geez, you don't even know the flavor of your own wedding cake. That's why I told you that you should plan it."

"I'll burn you."

"And I'll nullify it. Hehe... remember when you caught that bouquet when we were playing weddings in fifth grade?"

"No."

"Aww, c'mon I know you do. You did such a great job with the wedding plan too." Mikan looked around. The church was decorated with red lotuses and sakura blossoms. "Although you have to admit. Even though you didn't plan it yourself you just _had_ to pick out the flowers."

"It was a burst of inspiration." He shrugged and let himself be hugged by his new wife as he gave one of those rare smiles of his.

* * *

A: Awwn. So sweet. Wait. Why am I paired with Ruu-chan.

M: Just admit you like him won't you.

A: Fine, I like him. Happy?

M: Overjoyed.

N: Hn... What happened?

M: I shot you. Twice. Oww!! Fire! Fire!! My shirt!!! Damn you stupid, retarded, idiotic, lousy, perverted, rabbit!! I don't know what she sees in you.

N: She?

M: God, you're stupid. Mikan of course!!

N: You're going down, hobo.

M: Bite me. Oww, you idiot I told you it's a freakin'_ expression_!!!!

_After Mari and Aoi are gone:_

N: Am I really a gloomy person?

Cheese: Yes.

N: OMFG!! The cheese is talking!!!! *runs away*

Cheese: Don't forget to review! ^.^


End file.
